The sky is almost always vivid blue nowadays. A few cotton tuffs of clouds are scattered but they seem so high up in the heavens. And the heat? Well, it's almost Lent--what do you expect?
I've always been a summer person--a child of summer, literally, being April born. I love clear cloudless skies, warm afternoon breeze that eventually cools come night time, and the sun--oh, how I love the sun shining in its full glory!
I wish I can still relate to my summer-loving self right now.
The clear blue skies and bright sun are causing too much glare it's annoying. The heat is unbearable...and I'm about to give birth to another child of summer.
Ages ago, I was a free-spirit. I do what I want, say what I want to say--I'm very much into myself. People see me as a very opinionated, domineering and overbearing person--i make no apologies. Oh, I don't go around bullying people--I'm a naturally bossy person. I don't like people telling me what I should or shouldn't do with my life. I want every decision and every move I make to come from me.
But all that has changed when I got pregnant and got married. All the stubborness drained away and the fiesty me learned to depend on others. I can still feel myself struggling to get out--not accepting circumstances as they are. I don't like being put into a situation, I've always believed that we make our own situations.
I hate whining and complaining but I've turned myself into a whiner--an overly sensitive pregnant wife. In the process of wanting to be a good wife and mother, I lost myself. I lost my summer-loving persona. I lost the brightness in me that comes every summer.
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