First-time Pregnancy 101

I'm 29 weeks pregnant today--but before I reached this point, I had to deal with a lot of doubts most first-time mothers deal with... I bought every books on pregnancy I can find, searched the web for articles about pregnancy and breastfeeding, asked around--but NEVER felt satisfied.

There were moments when I feel that even my own husband don't understand what I'm going through--all those body changes, mood swings, hormonal changes and pregnancy symptoms. It can be overwhelming.

In those moments I felt alone in my situation--I realized a few things that NOBODY ever told me...

1. Choose a doctor you feel like he/she can be your friend. You have to be comfortable with your OB-Gyne because your life and your baby's life depend on him/her. Don't just go to the first referral you get, trust your instincts.

2. Just because you are pregnant, it doesn't mean you have to change routine or stop doing the things you usually do. Don't just lie around!

I was also planning my wedding during my first and second trimester so I had a lot to keep me busy. The only important thing you should remember is take sufficient rest--eight hours sleep plus afternoon nap. If you feel hot flashes, take a quick shower. If you feel tired, lie down on bed or on a couch--just don't do the 'lying around' thing the whole day.

3. During the first trimester, you will experience 'morning sickness'--which is kinda ironic because it can happen anytime of the day or even last the whole day. It's just a feeling of nausea or body malaise accompanied with vomiting or aversion towards certain food or smell and incessant craving for a particular food.

What I did was give in to my craving--you don't vomit what you crave for! And whenever I feel empty stomach and I can't think of anything to eat, I eat graham crackers and fruits such as bananas, apples and oranges. They helped alleviate my hunger and don't make me puke afterwards. I was told to eat salted crackers but they just make me feel bloated afterwards and I would feel more acid in my stomach I feel like puking--so I stuck to eating foods with a bit of sweetness.

There's nothing wrong with vomiting and feeling sick just don't forget to eat--or even so avoid eating all together. Mommies and babies need nutrients during the first three IMPORTANT months of fetal development. I took vitamins prescribed by my OB and drank milk supplement for pregnant women--they're big help especially if you don't get to eat a lot.

4. Eat right but don't punish yourself! I guess I'm lucky because I'm not putting too much weight despite of eating lots of chocolates and ice cream...I'm guessing that the trick here is to eat your fruits and veggies too--especially the ones that aids in digestion--and drink lots of fluids. Trust me, nobody has to suffer constipation and dry skin.

Another good thing about eating the right stuff is you don't get sick--think of the hassle of having to call up your doctor to ask if a particular OTC medication is ok for you to take. We all know our basic food groups, just follow what's on that pyramid--also, you will need to eat foods rich in folate, iron, calcium, B complex, Vitamins A, C & D.

5. Choose your outfit WISELY--you're not pregnant all your life so before stocking up on maternity clothes, think twice.

There are a lot of clothes that would fit pregnant women but are not exactly designed as maternity wear. You can buy empire cut dresses, baby doll tops, long tees and pair them with tights, leggings or even jeans. Just a few tips:

a. Tights & Leggings-choose the ones that have soft waist band. It feels nice and snuggly but not too tight on the tummy.

b. Jeans-I was so lucky to have bought these really great pair of jeans from Jeans West...Low-waist, straight-cut with--get this--adjustable buttons! Just look for one of those--you'll get what I'm raving about.

c. Empire cut Dresses & Baby Doll Tops-choose dresses that you're sure you can wear even after giving birth. I wear tons of empire cut dresses even before I got pregnant so there really was no need for me to change style. I choose dresses that show a bit of cleavage but totally loose-fitting below the breasts but still drapes nicely on your upper torso. They're kinda hard to find because there are just certain fabrics that drape nicely.

d. Long Tees-just make sure they are stretchable--avoid shimmery fabrics--you wouldn't want you tummy area to shine when it hits light.

6. Don't forget about ROMANCE! You are pregnant but you're still a woman. First three months you can still have some bedroom action but after that--believe me, it's going to be painful and uncomfy. Here's what you and your partner can do...

a. Well, you can still have fun the bedroom without going all the way, right?

b. Share back rubs and soft massages--it will soothe you especially with all those leg cramps and backaches you will experience.

c. Cuddle on the couch while watching romantic flicks--or whatever you guys enjoy watching.

d. Have a romantic date--for obvious reasons: we women dig that!

e. Enjoy a fun activity or do together a household chore--well, it's not exactly romantic but it's still a bonding moment.

f. Get your partner involve in EVERYTHING--it's not just your baby. Have him accompany you to your prenatal check ups, lab tests, baby stuff shopping, let him feel your tummy whenever your baby kicks, let him talk to your tummy so your baby will also be able to distinguish his voice.

7. Go High Tech! The concept of a fertilized egg having a 'soul' might still be a mystery but pregnancy itself is not. Go online and you'll be amazed at the amount of information you'll get regarding pregnancy, breastfeeding and child-rearing. I don't mean to be biase but I really love this website, http://www.babycenter.com

8. If you don't have access online, look for printed literature... my favorite book? The BABY RULES by Jamie Schaefer-Wilson & Jo Anne Germinario [published by Health Communications, Inc.] It's such a fun read because it's written from a baby's perspective--it's like having your own kid talk to you. It's not exaclty a book on pregnancy, more of what happens after you give birth--well, for me, that's the scariest part.

9. Don't forget about HYGIENE--don't believe in old wives tales. I hear a lot of flak coming from some of my friends who are med students that most women on labor forget about their personal hygiene--and well, they don't smell nice. You wouldn't want your doctor wrinkling his/her nose in front of you.

10. Have a high pain threshold--you're going to feel a lot of it especially during the last few weeks of prenancy or as soon as your baby have his/her rapid growth spurt in your tummy. You will feel lower backaches, cramping on your abdominal muscles, leg cramping and a lot of stress in your pelvic area. Never take any pain killer--topical painkillers are ok but oral medications are definitely bad for you and the baby.

Read about exercises and sleeping positions for pregnant women--and follow them religiously because those exercises and sleeping positions really help lessen the pain and bodily stresses you feel.

11. Finalize which hospital you will go and plan your transportation. Don't leave this to the last minute--it's practical to inquire about hospital services and its corresponding fees.

12. Last but not the least: Don't procrastinate--don't leave anything up to the last minute. Prepare the following one month before your due date:

a. Baby Stuffs to bring to the hospital.

• 2 Hats, 2 sets of baby outfits or buntings, 2 pairs of mittens and booties, tons of cloth diapers and 2 blankets with hoods for swaddling. Have these properly embroidered or labeled with your last name so they don't get lost or switched with stuffs from other babies in the Neonatal Unit.
• Feeding bottle--just in case.

b. Stuffs for you to bring to the hospital.

• Sanitary pads
• Changing clothes
• Pen and paper--I don't know, they just sound essential.
• Healthcard, pregnancy book, etc.--let your partner hold these stuff among other things. Health officials at the hospital will probably look for him to sign forms, etc.

c. Baby name--check the spelling and other details before having it officially printed and registered.

So there. It doesn't cover everything--just a couple of practical things I thought of--which, I'm sure a lot first time mothers don't realize...especially teenage moms. A lot of them don't have access to proper healthcare and information.

People can tell you a lot of things about being pregnant but if you are the one experiencing it, there are certain things you learn--have to learn to deal with--on your own. A great support system of family and friends is a big help but somethings--you just realize yourself. Trust your instincts.